This week I was told my baby was too fat to go to the 40 weeks. Ok, Ok. It was a little bit more politically correct than that. It was more like ‘Baby Braybrooke has had a growth spurt and we need to send you to have a fetal growth scan as we may need to induce you or schedule you for an elective caesarian.’
I went into meltdown mode.
You see I had been practicing my hypnobirthing techniques for months. Months darn it! And Baby Braybrooke has been head down, bum up for over a month now. I was really impressed that perhaps all that work I had put in, nourishing my body, having acupuncture and chiro and so on was going to hold me in good stead. I was going to break the tradition of people in my family having caesarians. (My mum had 4 and my sister has had 3).
I then started to question some of the crap I had been eating in the last month, thinking perhaps I’d fattened this baby up. (C’mon, quit being judgy judgy with me!)
You may think that sounds selfish and even as I type this I remember what Melissa Spilsted from our hypnobirthing course said “You don’t get a medal for going natural.” I also remembered her saying ‘Your baby is the right size for your body.’
You see I felt like I was missing out on the plan I had worked so lovingly and so hard for to give Baby Braybrooke the best, healthiest, calmest start to life and the whole being out of control thing weighed heavily on my shoulders. (Thanks Ainslie Deverson my lovely life coaching friend for making me see that).
So what did I do?
I went back to my affirmations.
- I calmly accept whatever turn my birthing takes.
- I am safe and my baby is safe.
- Each surge brings my baby closer to me.
- My baby is the right size for my body.
I surrendered and prayed that God would have His hand on the situation, whatever that would be.
I had the fetal growth scan and the radiologist doesn’t seem to think Baby Braybrooke is so big after all. (I need to confirm this with my Obstetrician though).
What do you need to let go of today? What does surrender look like for you? How can you sink into that surrender?
Some of you are feeling completely humbled at the moment in your circumstances. Some of you may be feeling beyond that. Jaded even. Skeptical that good can come out of the mess that seems to be your life at the moment instead of that perfect plan you had for your life. But have you considered that it’s not your plan that needs to take place. That God has something bigger and better, or a lesson to be learnt in the surrender. That another plan may ultimately be way better than you imagined?
Sink in. Stop struggling. Journal and pray about your situation. Meditate. Do what you need to do to have clarity of mind. Don’t stop seeking. Cry if needed. And when you’re ready a breakthrough will come through just when you feel like you can’t bear it anymore.
What’s your break through going to be?
What will it take to allow it to happen?
What’s happening in your perfect day?
How can you still dream big but also allow God to show you signs and wonders that will blow your mind? (Don’t worry He’s not going to let your talents go to waste!)
What’s getting in your way of living your life to the fullest? How can you turn those big trip ups into something more positive?
Whatever happens in your situation know that you have a loving God waiting to scoop you up in His arms. A God who longs for you to have a relationship with Him. (And girls it does not have to be boring!).
Will you sink into the plan for your life? Will you stop trying to control the circumstances?
Matthew 11:28 says “Come to me, all who are carrying heavy loads, and I will give you rest.”
Leave your heavy loads and rest my lovely ladies. You are so worth it.
What are you trying to control today? What do you need to let go of? How could you let go? I’d love to know what you think. Share the post using the buttons below and comment if you’re willing to share. The tribe would all love to know what you are going through and let’s be supportive in this process. Let’s lift one another up!